Wednesday, 25 June 2014

Messages Part Dos

Once upon a time I took y'all to a grocery store here in Scotland.
We laughed, we cried, we wondered, but most of all we liked the experience of looking into an everyday part of another culture.

Since that time I've been collecting photos from a few different stores to show y'all more messages (messages being slang for groceries here).

Come, laugh, cry, and wonder with me...

Outside a a chain of the large grocery stores is this lovely little place.
Because fast food joints are a rarity here this is a great thing to us Americans. 
However, they close just before 5 p.m. making the nearest fast food 17 miles away.

This is the inside of Tesco. 
It's kinda like a UK Target, and I love it because you collect points and they send me coupons and give us money off fuel.
This was obviously taken around "Hogmanay" which is the Scottish New Years.
See? I've been saving these up, just for you.

Escalator, in a grocery store. It's super cool and is designed for the "trolleys" or carts to go up anchored by a magnet in one wheel. 
Sorry I don't have a picture of it I didn't want to look like a paparazzi freakazoid hanging around waiting for a cart to go up.
I'm already trying to take these pictures on the sly...

 Heading upstairs, looks like a regular 'ol grocery store, huh?

Brussels sprouts, by the tree.
Have any of y'all ever seen them this way? 
Crazy, I didn't know they grew like that, I thought they grew in plastic bags; frozen solid.

The essentials here: root vegetables.
There are carrots, parsnips, neeps (turnips),  and tatties (potatoes).

This is a neep.
It's gigantuan, more delicious than it looks, and definitely better than it's common cousin in the US.
But seriously, as cheap as they are like this I buy the already peeled and diced version.
'Cause ain't nobody got time for that...

WHAT? Seriously? Who knew?
I thought these suckers grew like...
...wait, no I have no idea any preconceived notions I had. 
I just know they're in nasty fruit cakes.

This is a bag of scoop-your-own pistachios.
I love this thing, but it's also an expensive lesson to learn what different weights feel like.
Ask me how I know...

Legitimately here peanuts in-shell are called monkey nuts. 
Has anyone witnessed a monkey shelling and eating a peanut?

Back home in our kitchen:
These are the only hot dogs this family will eat here. 
They are sold by the German grocery store, "Lidl's" (think Aldi) and are called "mini bockwurst".
Otherwise if you get hot dogs...

You get 'em in cans. And they most assuredly are NOT like any hot dogs you've ever tasted.
This was from a collage I did for my Instagram, so yes, they do sell kangaroo steaks here too.

Another choice we do for hot dogs, they're not like smoked sausages in the US.
I think "meats" in the USA are largely influenced by German meats. 
It's a good influence.

These lovelies are expensive and are the only canned bread product to be found here, but at least I found something to work with all my Pinterest creations.

Bacon selection here.
UK bacon here is basically thin-sliced pork chops. 
If it's smoked, it's good, but just not bacon-y in an American sense, ya know?

This is American bacon here, "streaky rashers."
You can get it smoked or unsmoked, 
but if you choose unsmoked it'll be the wrong choice.

But I ain't trying' to tell you how to live your life.

Aberdeen Angus again! 
Mark's in hog heaven.
I mean beef heaven.

Leerdammer cheese (Germany shows it's culinary hand again!) is one of the yummiest.
Mr. Anderson loves the Scotch Bonnet Cheddar on the right.
The cheese selections in the UK are amazing.

Here it is very customary for people to "pop round for a coffee." 
Meaning you need to have your electric kettle ready, and some kind of small cakes, or cookies on hand to serve with your tea or coffee.
Check out this "cake" aisle.

These little lemon cakes on the bottom shelf are extremely cheap, extremely good, and extremely dangerous for my skinny jeans.

These cupcakes are gorgeous, but they aren't going to taste like the American equivalents.

I love this so much the grocery store customises my coupons to include a 60p off one for Warburtons Seeded Batch bread. 
Two slices, barely toasted to 3.5 on the toaster, 
with a little butter 
and Baxter's Raspberry Jam 
is my breakfast every morning.

Every. Morning.

These are flapjacks.
The best ones are from Marks and Spencer, but the nearest MS is 17 miles away. 
This is good influence for my dietary decisions. 
The best way to describe flapjacks is: oatmeal candy.

Baps = hamburger buns

These are pancakes.
Here they are buttered for a light snack with a cuppa tea.
You will be laughed out of Scotland if you tell anyone you eat them for breakfast 
with maple syrup on top.
Right, my sweet Scottish friends?

My father, Mark, and countless others love these: butteries. 
They're like a flattened croissant and eaten for breakfast with butter and jam.

These are scones, if you've ever wondered.
Even though they're a teensy bit sweet we use them like biscuits when Mark makes his great gravy.

Who knew?!

I. Love. These.
They're French, luscious, and £1 for 8.
Carb haven here I tell you.

Hard to find in the US: meringues.
(Here they pronounce them "mer-ong")
They make fabulous and simple desserts with some fruit and real whipped cream on them.

This would be the honey section.

Check the variety!
People here take their honey very seriously.

This is Jell-O.
But it's called "jelly" here 
(never ask for a PB and jelly sandwich, it's "JAM")
Here they come in a ultra-super Jell-O jiggler form that you must dissolve in hot water.
See how I'm squishing the ultra-Jell-O here?

Fun Facts:
If you make your Grandma's wonderfully lucious Cranberry Salad for Thanksgiving 
and attempt to use one of these suckers 
when the recipe calls for a package of [powdered Jell-O]
you will have made a bad decision.
You will have a bowl full of what looks like something someone unswallowed.
It will have small red chunks of Jell-O all over.
You will have made a bad decision.

I'm not quite certain of the rules, but this is the egg aisle.
Nary a refrigerator in sight...

It made me laugh to see it labeled as "Family Format."
I laughed again, a mirthless laugh, when I realised the UK package only contains 2 sleeves of cookies.

You're darned right these are "Pots of Joy."
Cadbury rules the UK, and with these lovely little yogurt cups available, I'm ok with that.

These are essentially "Circus Peanuts."
Those nasty little orange mallow candy my dad loves?
Shrimps and Bananas...
A strange and ethereal combination I have yet to figure out.
I thought I liked them until I read the ingredients:
Beef gelatine?
Uhh, pass.

Pretty sure I used "ethereal" out of context.

You know there are just some days you want a steak.
These'll hold you in a pinch.
They are reaaalllyy good.

Mr. Anderson is a Happy, Happy, Happy man.

Mr. Anderson is a Happy, Happy, Happy man.
Well, well, well, look what's creeping there on the bottom of the picture...
CANNED hot dogs STRIKE again!!!

Chips in the freezer.
Uh huh.

Some candies, called "sweeties" here.
Correct me if I'm wrong but these would translate to
"Granny Suckers?"
Not sure, but it's my best guess.


Sour Plums.

And why?

These were probably posted for the likes of me and my tendencies toward giving a whining kid a hunger buster.
But I ALWAYS pay for them.
We'll just see how the stores like my 3 year old sans her shopping trip banana...

And then...
When we were in the USA I took a few photos inside a grocery store to compare and contrast the differences for my Scottish friends.

UGH, please stop comparing and contrasting.

This is the salad dressing section.
It's big.

The pictures have been slightly blurred in an effort for the Mission Scotland name not to be accused of an endorsed product advertisement.

Either that or we gotta cruddy photographer on our hands.

Here's the peanut butter aisle.
Did you know more Americans get their peanut butter from peanut butter aisles than from any other source?
It's true.

This is called the Family Size section.
These are gigantic portions of products in bulk.
Usually churches, schools, or families with a real hankerin' for mayonnaise buy this stuff.

OH a clear picture!
In that case, this is a paid advertisement for Diced Green Chiles.
I, personally cannot cook without these.
I'm a New Mexican you know.
Pretty sure my genetic code says I have to use them.

Macaroni and Cheese:
It's kinda a big deal in America.

American bacon section.
It's all streaky.
It's almost cleared out too.
That's because we LOVE bacon and have the cholesterol levels to prove it.

A lone silent tear slips down her cheek as she stared in remorse and regret. 
Things were not the same.
They couldn't be...
They had an ocean between them and nothing could make up that distance.
Never had she wanted Maple Syrup so bad as when she was looking at shelves full of it.
Yeah, we love this too.

And we feed our children this for breakfast.
It's a good source of 7 vitamins and minerals you know? 
Practically a vegetable.

Beautiful cereal aisle...

These are what Froot Loops really look like. 
They taste as good as they look too.
(All you confused Americans out there, next grocery store post I will compare and contrast the UK and US Froot Loop cereals.)

For love of...STOP with compare and contrast!

And I don't want to be a tattle tale or anything, 
but the prices of the Lucky Charms and Reese's Puffs are $2.82 and $4.52...
Which is £1.66 and £2.66.

Oreos have gone nuts while I was out of the country...

Yup, plumb crazy.

OH. My. Lanta. 
I mentioned these here and I'm not exaggerating when I say we ate our last carefully hoarded pack of these just last week.
PB Pop Tarts in the Anderson household...from April to June, that's a record of some sort.

Thanks all y'all who stuck it out and explored grocery stores on both sides of the Atlantic!

I LOVE taking you shopping with me (mainly because of the shopping part).

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